From the moment I found out I was expecting my second child, I was filled with so many emotions and worries about having 2 children so close, being able to love another child as completely as the first, and being able to give myself equally to them…
common emotions, for sure, and even more common is the purity of unconditional love and the ability our hearts have to grow and love more and more with each life we are blessed to love…magically we are given the ability to love more as our love is needed more…after having Ava, I realized I would always have “more than enough” love for each of my children and no longer worried about being able to give that to them…
Then we had 3….and the proverbial “middle child” was created…I have always been so sensitive to it. I have never wanted my Ava, my “middle child”, to feel as if she was lost somewhere in the “middle”…
truth be known…my girls all captivate my attention equally…each in different ways as they are in different stages…
and there is no geting “lost in the middle” from this little girl…
today…I feel inspired…to focus in on my sweet Ava Olivia…
She is a riot…quirky, brillant, mischeaveous, beautiful, stubborn, STRONG, sensitive, and tugs on my heart so…
(don’t mind that friendly little house fly…I would have photoshopped it out, but we had so many laughs looking at it flying off her head, I decided to leave him in…)
Ava and I play this word association thing…I will say a word and she tells me the first thing she thinks of…
when I say…
happy…you say “love”
pretty you say “wierd”
daddy you say “Jason”
sassy you say “ewwww”
mommy you say “biiig mommy”
baby you say “adam”
olives you say “i love olives!!!”
sometime I get some really good stuff…and sometimes the answer I get to everything is
“uhhhh…Stupid!” with that facial expression…
I am probably the sappiest mom on the planet…many nights I can not sleep…I usually spend time researching the internet to teach myself the latest photo trick I wanna master, editing pics, working on my blog book, or just enjoying random eye candy. But some nights, I just crawl in bed with my little ones…lately I love to cuddle up with Ava while she sleeps, esp. after our days when we have butted heads or had competing stubborness…(she is my clone in many ways). I will never take for granted time spent cuddled up in a bed way to small to hold my preggo form, my love, or my heart…
Ava, we are so proud of all the difficult things you are working so hard to bravely face…(like going and doing things without Mommy and Daddy…like her Church sunday school classes”
Everytime Ava offers a family prayer, whether it be dinner time, bedtime, or whenever…she often inserts this sweet sentiment..
“I am trying to be brave at the big primary and being brave in the little primary…bless me to be brave…”
oh, how it melts my heart…
Ava reminds me all the time that as a Mother I am raising another little person…a human being with unique needs and desires…and with a personality that has been present very early on. I am inspired to gently guide with respect and allow room for the things that make her who she is now and who she will be when she grows up.
i love you girl…
xoxo
Mommy
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